Infotaxis Blog

Myth: SuperAIDS is a kick ass form of regular AIDS.

 

Truth: In reality, SuperAIDS has little to do with regular AIDS. While regular AIDS slowly degrades the immune system slowly turning the body into a disease punching bag, SuperAIDS immediately renders the victim stupid and slightly resembling Tom Hank’s left nad. The host then proceeds to pour a glowing greenish fluid of a Jell-O-like consistency from every orifice. Granted no two cases are exactly alike, most victims typically explode into moonbeams and a thousand tiny eggs from which midgets are born.

 

Myth: You can only catch SuperAIDS from a previously infected person.

 

Truth:  SuperAIDS is the single most efficient pathogen known to man. It can infect anyone, anywhere, anytime. Not unlike a ninja, it sneaks up on unsuspecting carriers and promptly judo chops them in the goblet (it exists, don’t question me). For the most part however, people enjoy passing out SuperAIDS to those they find annoying or below their comic understanding. For example–> Jim: F1R5T!! Greg: Great you figured out how to count, congrats, you now have super aids.

 

Myth: SuperAIDS mutated from AIDS sometime in the late 90’s.

 

Truth: Although little is known of the actual origin of SuperAIDS, many anthropologists and ridiculously high Cocoa Puffs enthusiasts believe to have traced its ectoplasm trail back to a rough night between Michael Jackson and a weed-whacker shortly before the invention of the microwave.

 

So what have we learned? SuperAIDS is perhaps the only disease on this planet readily passed and willingly contracted without consideration of cultural consequence and moral ineptitude, except Pokemon cards. Thus, I call on you, the helpless reader to embrace your shattered innocence and go forth and tastefully tag as many noobs, dumbasses, and character commenters as you can. Because frankly, the world could use more midgets to attack Dennis Rodman’s kneecaps and I just hit you with the greatest gift your ass will ever receive. Congratulations, you now have SuperAIDS. 

[Taken from http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1732108]